Sunday, February 7, 2010

Mothering A Boy

I have yet to read the myriad of books written about men and boys, living with them or raising them, even though I do find myself baffled and at a loss about the best approach to some of Jasper's decidedly boyish behaviors. And I own at least 3 unread books on the topic. Jasper can be aggressive, hitting or throwing things at people, he is extremely afraid of the classic evil characters in children's stories - wicked fairies, trolls, and wolves come to mind - and sweetly and spontaneously affectionate with me and others he loves. All three of these qualities are more prevalent among the boys I know than the girls. Instead of feeling fired up to read about it and learn to deal with these qualities in an educated way, I am finding myself getting comfortable with the bafflement and the feeling of not knowing what to do. I even find myself enjoying Jasper's extreme reactions - not in a sadistic way, but with curiosity because they are so unlike my experiences with Lucy or what I remember about my own childhood. It helps that at the end of the day, the sweetness almost always prevails.

1 comment:

WCFIELDS said...

I'ld say you are on the right path! Just going with the flow and enjoying - I did with Reuben and I think he is a fine young Man :-)Sometimes it was easier with Reuben because of the unknown - I think I projected a bit more with Betsy May because of my own experiences - does this make sense? I'm so looking forward to the End of the Month when we will be seeing you guys!